Backpacking with Alex

It has been an intense summer for me. My son Alex and I spent most waking hours in a flurry of play, adventure, exercise, dialog and Olympics viewing (there was also some "math play" involved, but we won't go there now). He has gone back to his mother's for school, and I am left feeling a bit sad and missing his company. At the same time, I'm relieved to be able to get the rest that I need, and get my home back in order -- closer to providing the comfort that most supports my time at home.

Alex and I had many fun times together, too numerous to list here. One memorable time was going to an orphanage in Mexico, and seeing him interact with the kids. I'm impressed on how easily they are able to show mutual regard and also play together. At our last trip, we took the children to a swimming pool. One of our trip leaders demonstrated scuba diving, and Alex very readily learned and assisted in the training - eventually taking over the teaching as the adult leader needed rest from all of the swimming.

But, hands down, my favorite activity this summer happened on our backpacking trip to John's Meadow in the San Gorgonio National Forest. It was here that I was able to celebrate Alex's life stage and encourage him into his teenage years with a "Rite of Empowerment". I wanted to pass on some of the wisdom I have gathered up until now, to give him an idea of where I'm coming from -- so that he has a good foundation from which to move ahead, to show him support and encourage him to be himself in spite of external cultural pressures. I had three other adult male friends along with me, which I believed understood my intention and hope for this trip. My friends came through with their own gifts of wisdom and celebration; I am grateful for their presence and support. I thought about my letter to Alex months beforehand, but finished it a week before our trip. The content of the letter is a private matter, and the details of what happened are also between us. But I have to say something about my experience, as I felt a deep joy and gratitude as the intention and the gift that I offered to him were fully received, meeting deep needs for contributing, of meaning and love. And that's worth celebrating!

Bowling Water Bottles - Recycling Day

The empty water bottles were packed and stacked on top of each other; they kept falling over in my garage as the mountain of plastic grew. My son Alex said to me "Dad, you really need to recycle those..." So, yesterday we did recycle them, but not before we had a little fun. Alex wanted to stack the bottles up in a pyramid structure, and toss a bowling ball at them. I let him try, but those things don't stack because they don't hold their shape (i.e. they are single use -- they were designed to only be used once, and then they are to be discarded).

So, he tried the next best thing -- he stacked the boxes and bags of bottles on top of each other, and bowled them away. Here's the video:



For us, it was a symbolic goodbye to the single-use water bottle -- as we took the Surfrider Foundation pledge to drink only out of reusable containers.

NVC encourages us to get our needs met, but only if it also meets the needs of others (i.e. not at the expense of others). I was drinking out of single use bottles to get my need for "ease" met -- (i.e. the bottles are pretty darn convenient). I realized that the plastic bottles adversely affects the environment and wildlife creating a problem for me -- it does not meet my needs for integrity, mutuality, and contributing to the wellbeing of others.

As I read more information about plastic, I also discovered that there are also health risks to using them, especially when the plastic bottles are subjected to heat. I used to keep a case of bottled water in my back seat, but started to notice that the water tasted funny after they had been sitting in my car in the Southern California heat -- now I know why :-(

I'd enjoy hearing how any of this strikes you.


Plastics Are Forever









The Truth About Plastic













Freshen Up Your Drink

Sunscreen Destroyer Ceremony

Yesterday, Alex said he is frustrated with the sunscreen that I (his dad) apply to his face and body every morning -- I'm guessing he's annoyed and wanting more comfort and autonomy. I want to contribute to his long-term health. This video shows how empathy can be helped by action. Alex decided he wanted to mark up a bottle of sunscreen, and run it over with my car a few times. It was fun!