Stroll Through Manhattan

I went for a long walk through Manhattan last Sunday. I was more excited to go this time (no anxiety), as I was better prepared than in my first adventure. I had my backpack, with plenty of water, emergency granola, an apple, extra cash, jacket, rain gear, a map and a compass. I had a clearer idea of the transportation options and the terrain. On the bus on the way there, I remember smiling at the thought that going to New York wasn't much different than backpacking in the mountains -- just with more people, less nature and much more noise.

In my first trek, I hiked from the NJ Port Authority to the United Nations (from 8th Ave to 1st Ave on 42nd street) , where I felt inspired by the artwork and vision portrayed in the lobby. I wasn't able to see the council chambers since the tours were closed on Sundays, but I managed a few photos and souveners.

My second trek led me to buy tickets to SPAMalot at the Shubert Theatre. It was just the kind of witty off-color humor I needed after a long work week in technology land. Here I met an arts student from Los Angeles; what a small world.

My favorite spontaneous adventure was strolling through Bryant Park, and sitting down in a chair under a tree for a while -- reading, thinking, watching people going about their park experience, and just generally being there soaking it all up (I like doing this kind of thing when I travel). I happened to sit in a table diagonally across a walkway from three New York women (or so I guessed from their laptops, books and relaxed manner). I had noticed them before, but was intrigued to see that one of them was showing off her "new" tatoo to her other friends -- I was pleasantly distracted from my phone conversation with Craig (I wish I would have told him sooner).

As time went by, I noticed they were reading a book by one of the story tellers I blogged about last time, and I had the urge to strike up a conversation with them. But something was holding me back! My darn "jackals**" were keeping me from connecting with these gals. They were saying things like "you will disturb their time at the park", "who are you to approach three gals in a park?" -- I was feeling anxious because I was wanting connection and acceptance, and these critical thoughts kept me from approaching them. I think that a part of me was also feeling anxious as I was wanting more comfort and safety of knowing the social "vibe" of the park. And I had this debate with myself long enough that it got to be time to go to the play, which started at 7 PM. I got up from my table to go to the bathroom, and came back to notice they were gone. Darn! Now I have to live with the regret of not at least trying. It may sound weird, but I secretly hope one of them will Google "Bryant Park" and find this... But more likely, I will feel sad and frustrated, which may provide the motivation to continue my jackal** inventory work!

But just in case, if you see this, please shoot me an email, would ya?
Warmly,
James

** Jackals are critical thoughts that steal life and opportunity.